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If I were to really be true to myself, I feel guilty of having tiny faith. I call myself a Christian and yet I have such small faith in God, in what He can bring into my life. I thank Him for blessing me with my job and yet I buckle at the reality that’s ahead of me.

I’ve become selfish and preoccupied with my issues, neglecting that other people are going through so much more difficult things. I justify by thinking that no matter how badly they are suffering, it still does not invalidate what’s going on with me.

I seriously think that I am at my breaking point, and I’m backed into a corner where I am stuck and have no choice but to continue on in this “career” where I feel lonely, miserable and enraged. I am so sorry for feeling this way. For seeming ungrateful.

I pray for God to give me the strength to face this challenge and to fuel this mustard seed of faith that I have to completely and wholly trust in Him.